Writing Sales Letters: Getting w-a-a-y too personal

OK, look… it’s like 90 degrees here and sunny, with VERY low humidity, so this is going to be quick.

It’s Friday and I’m big into unwinding today, so let’s get busy:

The other day, we talked about opening your sales correspondence with names, and about personalization, in general.

But what you also need to know, is there are times when you’re being “too personal.”

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For example, ever call some big company’s customer service line and get a call center overseas somewhere?

You have?

Don’t you hate it when every other word is your name?

“Yes, Mr. Garber”… “Thank you, Mr. Garber”… “Mr. Garber, is there something else we can do for you?”… “Mr. Garber, we are transferring you to that department, are you OK with this, Mr. Garber?”

Sheesh, it’s like being in a bad echo chamber, isn’t it?

Well, believe it or not, people do the same thing in their sales letters:

“Hi Craig”…

“Craig, can you believe this?”

“Wow, Craig, I bet you’d love this.

“Craig, how much would this be worth to you?”

Frankly, when you’re going on like this… it’s worth nothing.  Zero.  Nada.  Squat.  Zilch.

Point being, just the same way you want to be personal and friendly with someone… there’s a limit here, as well.

If you wouldn’t say it in real life, don’t write it, either.

Make sense?


Have a great weekend – I’m going fishing.

Now go sell something,  Craig Garber

P.S.  “All I can say is, I thought last months newsletter was the best business building newsletter I had ever seen. Thank you for all of your help, and may God bless you and your family.”  Jeff Cotterman – Brownsburg, IN

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About the Author

Craig GarberAuthor of "How To Make Maximum Money With Minimum Customers, " and publisher of Seductive Selling - an offline marketing newsletter currently read in 15 countries, world-wide. In a nutshell, I do two things: 1. I show you how to attract a reliable, steady stream of pre-qualified leads who are ready to do business with you NOW... 2. And I increase your net profits and cash-flow, by increasing your customer, client, or patient value -- often, dramatically. How do I do this? By developing, and helping you implement, unique, personalized lead generation and marketing strategies... using compelling sales messages that push your customers emotional buy-buttons. I've worked with over 300 clients in more than 104 different industries, since March of 2000, and I really enjoy what I do. I'm a stable, reliable, happily married family guy with three kids who loves life and always follows through on my commitments and promises. I love to listen to music, workout, read, travel with my family, take pictures, and go bass fishing. I always say "Yes," when it comes to good cigars, good books, and good coffee :-)