Her Sweaty Curls In The Palm Of My Hand

My daughter and one of my sons both have birthdays in March. Here's a piece I wrote a couple of years ago that's one of my favorites, about my daughter. Let me know what you think of it:

I love putting my daughter to bed. It's one of the few times I can disconnect and simply enjoy being right there in the moment.

We usually talk for a little bit, and then she just falls asleep cuddling her little doll.

Last night, I thought she was asleep and when I started pushing myself up, she said, with her eyes closed, "Don't go daddy. Hold my hand."

I laid back down with her and I let her curl her little fingers around my thumb, while I gently cupped the rest of my hand around the back of hers.

You know, there are certain distinct facial features that babies, infants, and young children have, that get lost as they get older.

For example, her lips.

The thin line between your lips and the skin immediately around your lips, is very defined when children are young. But this line loses its sharpness as kids evolve -- like fine sandpaper somehow slightly smoothes the edges as you go from being a baby to a young child.

And her eyelashes.

You can see each individual long dark eyelash as if it was a slim rod growing up out of her eyelids, slightly thinner than one of the narrowest pencil leads you slide into an automatic pencil, but nowhere near as stiff.

And as she's falling asleep, I'm lucky enough to rub my course fingers back through her silky fine damp curls, and over her perfectly smooth round head. I can feel each of her hairs over my clumsy rough hands, which don't seem to be so clumsy at those moments.

As I'm looking down at her face and her tiny little body, I'm wondering -- hoping with all the might I can muster up -- that somehow I will never ever lose this feeling, or these memories. That I can somehow permanently press this image into my mind like an artist burns the edge of a soldering iron into a wooden block, creating permanent etchings of a design.

It would be great if I could recall images like this one, that are buried away inside my memory banks, "automatically," the same way your elbow "automatically" twitches when you bang the spot right behind it. This would be the perfect "pick-me-up" whenever I get down or frustrated by something that’s going "wrong."

Although as I'm in this moment with her, it seems hard to think anything could possibly be "wrong," you know? That this warmth is so overpowering, nothing could possibly diminish or override it.

She is only the second woman in my life I've ever gotten close to -- her mom (my wife) being the first. And both of them have a very soothing effect on me.

As I'm sitting here feeling content, filled with the glow of what's surrounding me, I am reminded again of what's important. Sitting in front of your computer yields few, if any memorable experiences. And it's the memories in life you carry around that make you or break you. That fill you up or leave you feeling empty.

I don't think I'll have too much trouble recalling something this powerful, whenever I want. At least not for a good long while, anyway.

Now go sell something, Craig Garber

P.S.: Cyrell Price, from Jacksonville, Florida, recently sent in this note: "Good Morning, I'm a new subscriber to your Seductive Selling Newsletter. I just received my package in the post the other day and I absolutely love it!" Discover why and fall in love yourself, when you test-drive it free at: http://www.kingofcopy.com/ssnl

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Elliott Spitzer Marketing Lessons 101

In addition to being one of the costliest and most damaging political falls from grace in the history of New York politics, the news about Elliott Spitzer contains tons of marketing and business lessons as well, so let's dig in, right now:

One. Spitzer's entire platform was built on "ethics." He chased down lots of bad guys, especially some big financial firms most people would have been afraid of challenging. And in reality, he actually did a lot of good work.

In fact, he was hated on Wall Street for this. I read an interview last week and one broker, when he heard the news about Spitzer, said, "Yes, there is a God."

Most successful people have enemies however, so this isn't a surprise.

What is a surprise is that Spitzer got caught with his proverbial pants down. Literally.

If your entire persona is built on one thing, and your get caught in the very same cookie jar you've been responsible for raiding, there is no other outcome to be expected than failure. The good news is, America is a very forgiving place (think Marv Albert, Michael Milliken) and Spitzer is very likely to be back at some point in time, but perhaps not as a politician.

Lesson: If you're going to be a staunch defender of anything, the fastest way to get thrown off the top of the mountain is by not drinking your own kool-aid. No one's bullet-proof. (Remember reverend Jim Baker?)

Two. When confronted with an obstacle, take swift action -- this is usually the ONLY way you'll have some input on the outcome. I believe had Spitzer waited to see what would happen, he would have suffered the same political fate, but there would have been a number of other severe legal misfortunes to reckon with as well. This would have magnified his situation and compromised his family even further.

Lesson: Being decisive (making decisions) and taking fast action have been pillars of success since business was invented. These specific traits were pointed out by Napoleon Hill in "Think And Grow Rich" and they are as true today as they were back then.

Three. Admit your mistakes. I could be wrong, but I don't think I've seen Spitzer take specific ownership of what he's done. He's said somewhat evasive things like, "I've got to get my personal life in order," but he hasn't come out and stated that he's been sleeping with a variety of hookers for the last 10 years. Of course, this isn't exactly some humble pie that's easy to digest, but there again, that's why he's in trouble.

The truth is, in any relationship -- whether it's with your spouse, or with your customers -- when you've done something wrong... the fastest way the other person will get over it is when you take full ownership of what you've done.

Lesson: Full disclosure and being completely transparent in your dealings, is the fastest way to build trust. Doesn't matter if you're in a new relationship, or if you've messed up an existing one. No one's perfect (Lord knows I'm not.), but that’s not a problem -- no one's looking for you to be perfect. They're just looking for you to be honest and open. Flaws are not the problem, they are a part of life -- pretending you don't have them is a problem.

Now go sell something, Craig Garber

P.S.: Go here and take this free test-drive, and you will receive more marketing strategies in the next few months, than you've received in the last few years: http://www.kingofcopy.com/ssnl
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Last day to take advantage of the free open telephone workshop March 20th

Final notice on this: I’m out of town at the publishing business conference and expo up here in New York City, where it’s been pretty darn windy and cold.

Today’s the last day you can qualify to participate on the free open telephone workshop I’ll be hosting on Thursday night, March 20th at 7pm Eastern time. The call will discuss how to eliminate self-sabotaging behavior and limiting beliefs about success you may have, and there will be absolutely NO pitching on this call, or no soliciting of anything.

The workshop will be open to everyone who orders “How To Make Your Dreams Come True,” before tomorrow night when I get back from the windy Big Apple.

The information that will be shared on this call will be incredibly helpful to anyone who studies success or who wants to become even more successful (the two usually go hand in hand). Plus, you will also receive a special e-mail address to send any personal questions or issues you may need help with, and I’ll do my very best to answer these questions without pulling any punches, on this rare call.

You can get “Dreams Come True” at http://www.kingofcopy.com/dreamscometrue and not only does it come with a no-risk money back guarantee, but frankly, it’s dirt cheap. Plus, this isn’t some airy fairy mumbo-jumbo, it’s the real personal story of how I leaped up past loads of other people, overcame an incredibly difficult background, and got exactly what I wanted out of my business life, and more.

Now go sell something, Craig Garber

P.S.: If you’ve ever felt “guilty” or the slightest bit “undeserving” about success, then this is something you don’t want to miss out on. I will NOT be doing anything like this, ever again. So grab “How To Make Your Dreams Come True” right NOW at http://www.kingofcopy.com/dreamscometrue

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Compliance: The fastest road to Palookaville -- a one-way ticket to nowhere.

Check this out, it’s a true story. A while ago I met with a doctor -- a plastic surgeon. The meeting had nothing to do with business, or with plastic surgery. It was a completely off-topic meeting between acquaintances.

Frankly, this guy was brilliant, and I don’t say that about a lot of people. Not only is he an excellent plastic surgeon, but he also happens to be an artist. His real love is sculpture, and I’ve seen his sculptures -- they’re outstanding.

He’s an artist first, in fact. Goes to museums all over the world just to check out the art, and he’s really into the integrity of the message the art is trying to deliver. Meaning, he’s basically a creative, and his creative in his profession, is expressed in the results of his surgery.

To be honest, if I was going to have surgery (nothing could save my looks, not even this guy), I’d use a guy like him. He gets his kicks from the results, NOT from the process. Surgery in his case is only a means to an end, not the end itself.

He tells me his story, and it goes something like this: He’s been working underneath some guy who’s close to retirement -- maybe he’s 5 or so years away. He also teaches, because he says, “Teaching residents is really good for your career.” It’s kind of “what’s expected of you if you’re good.”

I’d imagine in his mind, he’s going to wait until the old fart either retires or keels over one day, and then he’ll take over the practice. In reality though, every single minute between today and whenever that time comes, he’s wasting his time.

This is a brilliant guy, with a tremendous work ethic, with literally hundreds of proven cases and surgeries under his belt. In reality, he’s probably far more qualified to run his own practice than many surgeons currently doing so, simply because of his competence, integrity and actual skill-set. Not to mention his enthusiasm, which is quite infectious -- and that’s rare for a physician who’s been practicing for 7 years.

But instead, he’s sitting around “waiting” to take his next big business step forward for one reason only: This is what his profession expects of him.

He’s programmed for conventional growth. And he’s SO wired to do what’s expected of him, if I ever tried to even suggest to him otherwise (which I wouldn’t -- I’m not interested in wasting my time or his), he’s be offended and tell me I don’t know what I’m talking about. That what I’m suggesting just isn’t the way things are done.

Of course it’s not.

This is a well-meaning but extremely foolish viewpoint of life. The “if I’m not comfortable with it, it must not make sense” principle that too many people follow.

In reality, what’s expected of you is often not necessarily what’s good for you, and it’s almost always not what’s best for you. This is because the masses set the standards, not the leaders. Leaders are far too busy working and leading and doing, to care about setting standards for others.

Most truly successful people could care less how others perform. Excellence for them isn’t one more step in the validation process, it’s usually many steps “away” from the validation process.

Not being willing to take destiny in your own hands, and instead following conventional programming, is really a sin in most cases. It holds you back and prevents you from accomplishing anything meaningful on your own terms.

At the same time, dogged determination and pursuit of excellence and success on your own terms, and refusing to accept anything but that, can propel you to heights you’ve never expected. And often times, the fuel you need to get there, comes from those who doubt you and who foolishly believe “conventional wisdom” is the only way to get where you want to go.

For example, I’ll never forget a conversation I had with an uncle of mine, 18 years ago, back in 1990. It was right before I got divorced, and in general, things around me were falling apart and my life was in shambles. He’s a college professor (most people in academia are programmed for conventional wisdom and they teach this to their students) and he looked me dead in the eyes and said, “Gee, if you had better parents and if things had turned out differently for you, you really could have been something and made something decent out of your life.”

He respected my intelligence, but being an academic, he made the mistake that this is how people become successful. He wasn’t able to look at the world through anyone else’s eyes other than his own.

At the time, I knew things weren’t going well for me, and frankly I didn’t know how to make them better, but I also knew that to write me off at the ripe old age of 27 was premature. I knew what he didn’t know -- that once I found out what I needed to know, I’d be able to do things on my own terms, the way I wanted to. Not his way, which by my rebel standards was ridiculous, but MY way, which was “different” but much more effective, explosive, and decisive.

Today, I make more in 30 to 60 days, than this guy does all year. I’ve thought of his comment many times over the last 18 years, and it’s often been some of the only fuel left in the tank, that I used to keep me going. I knew I would prove him wrong. I felt, “How dare he write me off.”

Once I started becoming successful and expanding my own consciousness, and once I understood why I’d been unsuccessful in the past, I also understood his comment was made out of ignorance, not malice. No one knows what they don’t know, but being ignorant about this fact is what tales away years of productivity and short-cuts you could otherwise leverage.

Being keenly aware of it and always trying to expand your mind, on the other hand, puts your destiny much more in your own hands, and gives you power you didn’t even think existed.

So don’t ever bet the farm on conventional wisdom, and keep shooting for the stars. Even if it takes you 18 years to get there, like me -- there is far greater satisfaction in ultimately doing what you want to do, on your own terms, than doing what someone else wants you to do, on theirs.

No one has more of a vested interest in your life, than you do -- but only if you make a conscious decision that this is how it should be.

Ask yourself what’s more important -- beating the system, or obeying it? The choice is yours.

I urge you to take this message very seriously. It is far sweeter to gloriously write your own rulebook, than to steadfastly obey someone else’s.

And on Thursday night, March 20th at 7pm Eastern time, I’m going to be hosting a completely free workshop, designed to do ONE thing, and one thing only: Help you get over any of the emotional stumbling blocks that have been in your way, and have prevented you from defining your own unconventional wisdom, or have challenged you whenever you feel you’re getting close. The workshop will be open to everyone who orders “How To Make Your Dreams Come True,” before tomorrow night when I get back from the Publishing Business conference I’m attending here in New York City.

There will be NO pitching on this call, or no soliciting of anything. The entire purpose of the call is for me to try and help you overcome any issues you may be struggling with, or anything you “sense” has been holding you back, that shouldn’t be. I expect the information that will be shared on this call to be incredibly helpful for not just newbies, but for anyone interested in attaining even more success than they already have.

You can get “Dreams Come True” at http://www.kingofcopy.com/dreamscometrue and not only does it come with a no-nonsense and no-risk munney back guar-un-tee, but frankly, it’s dirt cheap. Plus, the stories in it are fairly personal and may make your cry -- at least that’s what some folks who’ve invested in the package have told me.

Now go sell something, Craig Garber

P.S.: Take advantage of this VERY rare opportunity to get a genuine and candid “push” in the right direction by getting your hands on this NOW at http://www.kingofcopy.com/dreamscometrue It may be the smartest “no-brainer” decision you ever make.

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This sweet, tasty promise makes your deal come true.

At the heart of every great sales letter is a great offer. And at the heart of every great offer, is a sweet tasty promise your prospect believes you can deliver on.

Without an offer, you sell nothing. This is why most business cards are absolutely worthless -- they give you a phone number, a silly logo with cute fonts, and someone’s name. This is as compelling as a small soap dish, and is exactly why 100% of all business cards go straight into the trash, literally moments after you empty your pockets. (except my 8-panel card, which you get a copy of when you test-drive my offline Seductive Selling Newsletter at http://www.kingofcopy.com/ssnl )

If you want to make a sale you have to offer something, and to make most sales you have to offer something spectacular, something fabulous. You have to promise to deliver something in such a way that your prospect truly feels their life will be far better off AFTER they’ve been bathed in the benefits of your promise, than it is right now.

Here are three ways of doing this. They aren’t fancy, they don’t take advantage of the latest meta tag research, and they don’t boost your rankings in the search engines. But they do allow you to connect with your prospects and will make you a small fortune over time. (And by the way, don’t foolishly believe you make a small fortune overnight -- that’s only in the movies. Most people who make a killing, make it over time -- but when they make it -- watch out, it comes in like a tidal wave you never saw coming!)

Anyway, here are those three things that will make your promise sweet and tasty:

One, a comforting guarantee, something like this: " If after going through the program, you don't feel TRULY energized, inspired, and invigorated... if you don't feel the URGE to go out and make yourself a bunch of money... and if you don't feel a new energy flowing through your arteries, and your heart filled with fresh optimism and hope, then simply box it back up and send it back to my office, and we'll refund your investment in the program, no questions asked. And you can take up to six months to do this, no worries."

Two, a great testimonial, like this: "I have listened to your "Excuse Busters CD" from How To Make Your Dreams Come True, at LEAST 7 times -- you have cut YEARS off my learning curve as a new entrepreneur. " Bill Parlaman - Chester Springs, PA

And three, an incredible value, like this: "Order How To Make Your Dreams Come True before I get back from New York City on Tuesday night, and in addition to the program itself, which is dirt cheap, you will also get to participate on a free teleconference where we'll talk about little-known ways of getting over your fear of success or fear of failure, and so you can finally eliminate self-sabotage from your life, once and for all, and get everything you truly deserve to have. I will work directly with you on this, and since I came from nothing to where I am today, I can offer you practical real-life experience of the things that went through my head along the way."

These are just three of the strategies you can use to make a compelling and exciting promise. The examples of these strategies are actually all REAL examples, as is the promise for the teleconference as well. When you order How To Make Your Dreams Come True before I get back from New York City, you will get to participate on this Teleconference on March 20th at 7pm Eastern time. Get it at http://www.kingofcopy.com/dreamscometrue -- oh, and by the way, the video on the site was taken on a Sunday morning, right after I made waffles for everyone, while they were still sleeping.

Now go sell something, Craig Garber

P.S.: If nothing else, check out the goofy video. Again, you can see it at http://www.kingofcopy.com/dreamscometrue

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How to engineer your own biggest break ever: a true story.

Yesterday I interviewed Steven Pressfield, for my April Audio Success CD Interview of the month. Steve’s the best-selling author of the book The War Of Art, and this was one of the best interviews I’ve ever done. He’s a great guy with a number of very incisive and genuine messages.

We had a very candid conversation about self-sabotage and resistance, and how they impact and interact with one another, and how to smash them both. This got me all fired up to make something available to you that I’d previously only made available to a small list of people.

So, here’s the deal: I am leaving to go to New York City to attend the Publishing Business Conference in a few days, and I will be returning early next week.

I recently released a new product which tells the story about how I got started in this business, and how I was able to “break the cycle” of failure, abuse, being broke, and self-sabotage, that has been in my family for years. It is the first time I’ve spilled the beans like this, and I’ve done it because over the years I’d tell bits and pieces of this story, and every time I did, people said “I’d love to hear more of that.”

The fact is, there’s a reason why Steven Pressfield went from sleeping in his van, to living in Malibu today. There’s a reason why I went from driving a cab at night, to living here on my lake-house with my bass fishing boat out back. And inside “How To Make Your Dreams Come True”, I explain exactly how to do this, and how to overcome ANY bullshit excuses that may be holding you back.

So here’s what I want to do, because I really DO have a sincere desire to have some sort of a positive impact on your life. First of all, this product is dirt cheap, especially for what you’re getting. And second, for anyone who orders this product before I get back from New York on Tuesday the 11th, you will be able to get on a free telephone workshop I will be hosting on March 20th at 7pm Eastern time.

There will be NO pitching on this call, or no soliciting of anything. The entire purpose of the call is for me to try and help you overcome any issues you may be struggling with, or anything you “sense” has been holding you back, that shouldn’t be. I expect the information that will be shared on this call to be incredibly helpful for anyone interested in success.

So if for whatever reason, you always “known” deep down inside, you aren’t where you should be right now, and you’d love some help identifying why... and you’d love to get some specific steps to move out of your doldrums and get back your mojo, then you must be on this call.

Look, I don’t pretend to be some sort of a shaman or some sort of polished self-help guru. I’m not, by far. But I have been around the block my fair share of times, and I’ve been down in the dumps and I’ve still managed to climb the mountain. And in doing all this, I have a few good lessons to share with you, and a few kind words of wisdom and encouragement you can benefit tremendously from. So take advantage of this by checking out How To Make Your Dreams Come True, at http://www.kingofcopy.com/dreamscometrue and get on this free call on March 20th.

Now go sell something, Craig Garber

P.S.: If nothing else, check out the goofy video of what goes on here on any ordinary Sunday morning, and what my life is like. Again, you can see it at http://www.kingofcopy.com/dreamscometrue

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If you enjoyed this, feel free to pass it on to a few of your friends and business associates, or have them subscribe at http://www.kingofcopy.com

And if you have any comments about today’s message, leave them right here on my blog.

Whatever happened to...?

So I was rummaging through my drawers (no, not the ones under my pants, the ones under my desk) the other day and I stumbled across an article called “Top 10 Marketing And Advertising Ideas In 2006.”

Let’s take a look at a few of them, and see if they actually were “top” ideas. Ready? OK, let’s go:

#1 - Charmin’s “Brand Space” - this refers to what amounts to a bunch of gussied up fancy outhouses, mostly in Times Square (New York City). Charmin reckoned at the time that over 300,000 people would visit these places and that this was great “brand space.” I have no idea how many of these people felt the sense of reciprocity towards Charmin, that they subsequently went out and bought a few rolls. However, I do know many of them were very grateful there was a convenient loo they could use, precisely when they had to pee.

# 4 - The “Brajacket” - the Brajacket is an advertisement disguised as a dust cover for a book. Apparently when this first came out, these Brajackets werere one of the hottest new trends in Japan. Basically, Brajackets are given away free at newsstands and popular bookstores, and the theory is, you wrap these jackets around your book to protect it. Since it also comes with a bookmark, it has some functionality as well.

While I think this is very “cute,” I’m not sure how popular or effective this is. I’ve been to New York City two times since this article came out, and I’ve never seen even one of these things, on the street or on the subway. To me this is kind of like selling fruit, and then offering someone a disposable wrapper to hold their fruit in: too much work involved.

And lastly, # 8 - “Passout Marketing” - This group, out of Australia, is using nightclub hand stamps for advertising. These are the standard ink stamps that are placed on the back of your wrists when you leave a nightclub, to prove you’ve either paid admission to get into the club, or that you’re of legal drinking age, or so you can get back into the club if you leave.

Passout Marketing feels this space is too worthy to go unbranded, and so they are working with the club owners and advertisers to stamp marketing messages on club hoppers.

Now I’m no genius for sure, but to me, who the hell wants an ad stamped on their hands that they have to walk around with for a few days, until it finally wears off. Perhaps these folks should talk to the Brajacket people and come up with a free wrist cover with an alternative message on it.

Perhaps something like, “Go sell something -- for real.”

Don’t forget -- you measure an ad’s effectiveness by how much sales it generates, not how good it looks.

See you tomorrow, Craig Garber

P.S.: One thing that will NEVER go out of fashion is your need to consistently generate a steady stream of pre-qualified leads. Terry Wygal, from Houston, Texas, used this to boost the number of leads he got from a maximum high of 779, to 2,130 -- that’s a 273.4% increase on the first time out! Hey, even if you got only one-tenth this result, it would be a significant improvement, right? Check it out at http://www.kingofcopy.com/leads

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Have a baby, get paid. Have twins, get a bonus.

Check this out: People magazine’s about to pay Jennifer Lopez and Mark Anthony somewhere between $4 and $6 Million bucks, for the exclusive right to the first photos of their newborn twins.

That’s more money than some of J-Lo’s lesser performing movies have brought in -- holy momma!

But what about ROI -- do you think the magazine’s going to get a good return on this marketing investment? That’s the real question.

So let’s take a look at how some other new baby covers have performed, circulation-wise.

Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes: 60% increase on Vanity Fair’s cover!

Angeline Jolie: People magazine, up 45%!

Gwen Stafani: OK Magazine, up 32%!

Patrick Dempsey: McDreamy rocked People’s circulation by 17%!

Marcia Cross: Circulation of People DOWN 8%

Britney Spears: People’s circulation DOWN 15%!

So, are there any conclusions we can draw from this? I’m not sure, other than perhaps since Britney Spears has tended to evoke a negative or sour emotional reaction, no one was interested in what was going on in her life. And I don’t know about you, but to me I’ve got no love lost for Marcia Cross’s nutty character “Bree” on Desperate Housewives (my wife forces me to watch it).

Even Tom Cruise, who seems a little nutty, isn’t negative, so perhaps this “negative energy” theory isn’t hocus-pocus, who knows?

Anyway, let me know what you think J-Lo’s babies on the front cover will do for circulation, by leaving a comment here on my blog, below.

Now go sell something, Craig Garber

P.S.: New to the kingdom and want to dive in, but not sure where to start? I’ve recently organized all my products by category on my product page, so perhaps that’ll help you out. Check it out at http://www.kingofcopy.com/products

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FREE Workshop here in Tampa, this Thursday

I'll be hosting a fre.e workshop at the Centre Club on March 6th from 4:30 to 6:30 pm, called "Double Your Business And Triple Your Prof-its In 90 Days" and you can register for it right here:
http://www.kingofcopy.com/tampa

This is not a social hour, it's an opportunity for you to discover how to overcome the entrepreneur and sales-person's biggest challenge: Consistently being able to attract enough pre-qualified leads.

Directions and all that other good stuff will be sent to you after you register.

See you in Tampa, Craig Garber

P.S. This is limited to 100 people only, and the business club where I have my Mastermind meetings is sending this out to their list of 1,000 people, so first come, first served. http://www.kingofcopy.com/tampa